Have you seen the impact of bullying? Have you observed it in your home, workplace, or business? I know I have, in all those locations. Have you been involved in negotiating with a bully?
A year ago, a publisher came to my colleague Greg Williams and said, “We want you to write a book about negotiating with a bully. We think it is a big topic.” Greg turned to me for help as his ghostwriter, and a few weeks ago, Negotiating with a Bully was published.
We wrote about how to recognize them, the body language of a bully, the price of bullying, the impact in the workplace, and how to fight back. In the midst of writing our book, Harvey Weinstein was exposed and the #Metoo Movement began.
What did I learn that could help you?
Bullying is offensive, intimidating or insulting behavior that upsets the recipient, who feels humiliated or vulnerable. It includes gossiping, backstabbing, and scapegoating that undermining staff morale, self-worth and team cohesiveness.
I’ve written about an attorney who bullied me during an initial appointment to discuss my services, and a man who was not an attorney but served as the conduit between his wife, the attorney and our office. Negotiating with a bully made running my LNC business challenging.
There are huge economic, social, and workplace costs associated with bullying. You must confront it. I love to avoid conflict but found there was no escaping it.
You need to know at what point in time you should address a bully’s actions depends on the environment you’re in. Be mindful of the setting and how it affects what you do to show you’re not a person to be bullied.
People who are being bullied may experience the feeling of being defeated, of not being supported and of having to hide to avoid the individual.
When someone is bullying you, you must let them know that you are not going to take it to the degree that you have the power to do so. If you don’t, the cost of not doing so will just increase until you do eventually address it. Just be mindful of what is going on in any environment and to what degree you need to regain control of the situation and are successful in negotiating with a bully.
Order your copy of Negotiating with a Bully at this link.